![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
bironic
My thing for Paul Bettany took a nosedive a couple of years ago when he started defending Johnny Depp, and I stopped seeking out movies with him in them. Then he appeared in these two franchise tie-ins back to back, and it seems I'm still not entirely dead to his charms.
Solo: A Star Wars Story
It was… fine. My expectations were so low (#auditory pun) that I was pleasantly surprised to find it pretty consistently engaging/entertaining rather than dull. That said, I did not like:
- Everyone wants to psychoanalyze Han. I got fed up with that during House M.D. and it felt just as strange and tiresome here. Han isn't that interesting in this movie, besides. And he definitely didn't deserve the swift forgiveness given him by at least one other character.
- Feminist robot, yay, but the feminism was treated as a joke and the robot/alien rights plot was relegated to the passions of side characters while the protagonists treated it as a useful distraction while they pursued their heist goals.
- Gratuitous robot death and maiming.
- Pre-established relationship between Han and Daenerys that we were supposed to care about but not shown why. Followed up with Cipher!Daenerys and naïve Han.
- We are given backstory for how Han did the Kessel Run in however many parsecs. Gorgeous graphics, but… the AI they transplanted into the Millennium Falcon's computer did the math. It left a sour taste in my mouth that Han has been given credit for something a female-coded robot did the heavy lifting on.
- Relatedly, when Han stole/won the Falcon back from Lando… It was played for humor, but that ship contained the last vestige of the AI that loved Lando and that Lando sort of loved in return. :( I guess I can pretend Lando extracted it/her first, but no one even mentioned it.
I did like:
- Paul Bettany and his pointy thumbs. None of the plot really made sense but he provided a nice, sexy brand of cartoonish evil.
- The suave comic relief of Donald Glover and his capes. Someone said Glover played Lando as Billy Dee Williams specifically from the '70s, and that feels about right.
- Some funny lines, none of which I can remember at this point. Oh, like the moment when the crew on the Falcon all went "Aaah!" when they saw the tentacle space monster out the window.
- The tentacle space monster. RIP. I hope you can survive being sucked through a black hole or gravity well or whatever that was, since you hang out on the lip of one.
- The depiction of a galaxy beginning to rise up against Imperial rule but only in pockets, not organized or experienced enough yet to succeed. This is probably much more fleshed out in the Star Wars extended universe but I only know the movies, so I found it interesting, especially alongside Rogue One.
Avengers: Infinity War
Again: It was… fine. I expected a mess like the previous Avengers ensemble movies and Captain America: Civil War, which despite its title was an Avengers movie—so the overall coherence came as a nice surprise. They kept the plot simple. They grouped characters so the 27 protagonists could have more than a breathless three lines each between throwing punches. They moved around a lot, but individual scenes didn't feel as rushed as they have in the past.
I enjoyed:
- A glimpse of Vision and Wanda's sexy-funtimes getaway. Whatever, I ship it even though there's almost no substance to it in the movies & Vision was grossly controlling of her in Civil War. She can take him down when she needs to.
- The half scene with Paul Bettany's non-CGI'd face. Whereas in Solo, PB was in William Sadler resemblance mode, here, they fluffed his hair and did something to his face so he looked narrower and younger.
- And then there was the perverse pleasure of watching Vision arch and scream while being attacked, as the trailers promised. I'm sorry, you know it's a thing I have.
- Giant Peter Dinklage. If only they hadn't encouraged him to use his godawful Game of Thrones accent and deepen his voice so it sounded as silly as Chris Pratt trying to out-testosterone Thor.
- Bucky's last line. Quick, wavering, affecting. More so than Peter Parker's Cyrano death monologue, which I assume he got while others blew to dust in three seconds because he's white/human/Tony Stark's favorite. P.S. the moviemakers' interpretation of 50% seemed a BIT high.
I did not like:
- The background wiping out of the Asgardian refugees. Very little space given over to mourning, after we had an entire movie about saving as many people as they could.
- The way the movie portrayed Thanos sympathetically, lingering over his angst, providing generous air time for the "logic" behind his desire for galactic genocides, not permitting the heroes to point out what other fans have, that the gauntlet could obviate the "need" for population control by expanding resources with its immense power. Was I supposed to feel bad that he felt sad because he "had" to sacrifice Gamora, the only person he loved, when he'd abused her and she reviled him? The camera certainly suggested I should. UGH. If we still had to be this entrenched in Thanos' POV, Infinity War would have been a richer movie if, in the last shot, his smile had faded because upon achieving everything he thought he wanted, he realized the outcome didn't bring him peace and/or the sacrifices hadn't been worth it. Alternately, it would have been nice and interesting if Gamora or others had been able to convince Thanos that mass destruction wasn't the best path forward by appealing to his tenderer bonds of fatherhood.
- There were no stakes once Thanos obtained the Time Stone. I'd already thought the last ~1/3 or 1/4 of the movie would turn out to be a mind trick pulled by Dr. Strange on Titan or a reverie serving as part of the test for the Soul Stone, dumping him back into reality and showing he hadn't actually sacrificed Gamora. Didn't turn out to be right, but it's still hard to feel anything about all the death and destruction when all anyone—including Thanos—has to do now is touch the Time Stone and undo it. Like they'd already done in the movie itself, e.g. undoing Vision's death before repeating it another way. Like how we were supposed to feel something about Kirk's terminal condition in Into Darkness when they'd already discovered the regenerative powers of Khan's blood. UGH.
- Everyone acted stupid when it came to romantic love. Peter can't bring himself to shoot Gamora even though she's begging him to and he's causing everyone more pain and difficulty, until it's too late. Wanda can't bring herself to destroy Vision's stone even though he's begging her to and the fate of literally half the galaxy is on the line, until it's too late. UGH.
- The warriors of Wakanda using spears to fight a million alien hell dogs and not being able to thrash them without help. Would have liked to see more of the cool tech you know that team has developed besides the shield and the neurosurgery tools Shuri used on Vision.
In conclusion: Not a lot of feelings going in, still not a lot going out.
Solo: A Star Wars Story
It was… fine. My expectations were so low (#auditory pun) that I was pleasantly surprised to find it pretty consistently engaging/entertaining rather than dull. That said, I did not like:
- Everyone wants to psychoanalyze Han. I got fed up with that during House M.D. and it felt just as strange and tiresome here. Han isn't that interesting in this movie, besides. And he definitely didn't deserve the swift forgiveness given him by at least one other character.
- Feminist robot, yay, but the feminism was treated as a joke and the robot/alien rights plot was relegated to the passions of side characters while the protagonists treated it as a useful distraction while they pursued their heist goals.
- Gratuitous robot death and maiming.
- Pre-established relationship between Han and Daenerys that we were supposed to care about but not shown why. Followed up with Cipher!Daenerys and naïve Han.
- We are given backstory for how Han did the Kessel Run in however many parsecs. Gorgeous graphics, but… the AI they transplanted into the Millennium Falcon's computer did the math. It left a sour taste in my mouth that Han has been given credit for something a female-coded robot did the heavy lifting on.
- Relatedly, when Han stole/won the Falcon back from Lando… It was played for humor, but that ship contained the last vestige of the AI that loved Lando and that Lando sort of loved in return. :( I guess I can pretend Lando extracted it/her first, but no one even mentioned it.
I did like:
- Paul Bettany and his pointy thumbs. None of the plot really made sense but he provided a nice, sexy brand of cartoonish evil.
- The suave comic relief of Donald Glover and his capes. Someone said Glover played Lando as Billy Dee Williams specifically from the '70s, and that feels about right.
- Some funny lines, none of which I can remember at this point. Oh, like the moment when the crew on the Falcon all went "Aaah!" when they saw the tentacle space monster out the window.
- The tentacle space monster. RIP. I hope you can survive being sucked through a black hole or gravity well or whatever that was, since you hang out on the lip of one.
- The depiction of a galaxy beginning to rise up against Imperial rule but only in pockets, not organized or experienced enough yet to succeed. This is probably much more fleshed out in the Star Wars extended universe but I only know the movies, so I found it interesting, especially alongside Rogue One.
Avengers: Infinity War
Again: It was… fine. I expected a mess like the previous Avengers ensemble movies and Captain America: Civil War, which despite its title was an Avengers movie—so the overall coherence came as a nice surprise. They kept the plot simple. They grouped characters so the 27 protagonists could have more than a breathless three lines each between throwing punches. They moved around a lot, but individual scenes didn't feel as rushed as they have in the past.
I enjoyed:
- A glimpse of Vision and Wanda's sexy-funtimes getaway. Whatever, I ship it even though there's almost no substance to it in the movies & Vision was grossly controlling of her in Civil War. She can take him down when she needs to.
- The half scene with Paul Bettany's non-CGI'd face. Whereas in Solo, PB was in William Sadler resemblance mode, here, they fluffed his hair and did something to his face so he looked narrower and younger.
- And then there was the perverse pleasure of watching Vision arch and scream while being attacked, as the trailers promised. I'm sorry, you know it's a thing I have.
- Giant Peter Dinklage. If only they hadn't encouraged him to use his godawful Game of Thrones accent and deepen his voice so it sounded as silly as Chris Pratt trying to out-testosterone Thor.
- Bucky's last line. Quick, wavering, affecting. More so than Peter Parker's Cyrano death monologue, which I assume he got while others blew to dust in three seconds because he's white/human/Tony Stark's favorite. P.S. the moviemakers' interpretation of 50% seemed a BIT high.
I did not like:
- The background wiping out of the Asgardian refugees. Very little space given over to mourning, after we had an entire movie about saving as many people as they could.
- The way the movie portrayed Thanos sympathetically, lingering over his angst, providing generous air time for the "logic" behind his desire for galactic genocides, not permitting the heroes to point out what other fans have, that the gauntlet could obviate the "need" for population control by expanding resources with its immense power. Was I supposed to feel bad that he felt sad because he "had" to sacrifice Gamora, the only person he loved, when he'd abused her and she reviled him? The camera certainly suggested I should. UGH. If we still had to be this entrenched in Thanos' POV, Infinity War would have been a richer movie if, in the last shot, his smile had faded because upon achieving everything he thought he wanted, he realized the outcome didn't bring him peace and/or the sacrifices hadn't been worth it. Alternately, it would have been nice and interesting if Gamora or others had been able to convince Thanos that mass destruction wasn't the best path forward by appealing to his tenderer bonds of fatherhood.
- There were no stakes once Thanos obtained the Time Stone. I'd already thought the last ~1/3 or 1/4 of the movie would turn out to be a mind trick pulled by Dr. Strange on Titan or a reverie serving as part of the test for the Soul Stone, dumping him back into reality and showing he hadn't actually sacrificed Gamora. Didn't turn out to be right, but it's still hard to feel anything about all the death and destruction when all anyone—including Thanos—has to do now is touch the Time Stone and undo it. Like they'd already done in the movie itself, e.g. undoing Vision's death before repeating it another way. Like how we were supposed to feel something about Kirk's terminal condition in Into Darkness when they'd already discovered the regenerative powers of Khan's blood. UGH.
- Everyone acted stupid when it came to romantic love. Peter can't bring himself to shoot Gamora even though she's begging him to and he's causing everyone more pain and difficulty, until it's too late. Wanda can't bring herself to destroy Vision's stone even though he's begging her to and the fate of literally half the galaxy is on the line, until it's too late. UGH.
- The warriors of Wakanda using spears to fight a million alien hell dogs and not being able to thrash them without help. Would have liked to see more of the cool tech you know that team has developed besides the shield and the neurosurgery tools Shuri used on Vision.
In conclusion: Not a lot of feelings going in, still not a lot going out.
no subject
Date: Jun. 29th, 2018 05:13 am (UTC)- And then there was the perverse pleasure of watching Vision arch and scream while being attacked, as the trailers promised. I'm sorry, you know it's a thing I have.
*grin*
no subject
Date: Jun. 29th, 2018 01:24 pm (UTC)>>more importantly you have a daughter.
Yeah - before I trailed off his DVD extras/YouTube interviews/tweets, ~3 years ago, he was talking about how much his daughter likes "Uncle Johnny" and his fancy island. :( :(
no subject
Date: Jun. 29th, 2018 04:37 pm (UTC)On the plus side, all of Wakanda that wasn't the CGI fight was like a breath of fresh air...until the end. or, The End. Sigh.
no subject
Date: Jul. 1st, 2018 02:13 pm (UTC)>> although I was aggravated at how Quill was dooming the world, it seemed sufficiently in-character
Fair enough, but I don't have to like it. :D
>> I thought Wanda hesitated for not quite as long
You're right, she didn't hesitate as long ~in the moment~ when she faced him out on the battlefield, but I was also thinking about the whole days-long sequence of events that led there, starting with the first attack on Vision in Scotland. Wanda just did not want to see that her feelings for Vision and vice versa were not more important than billions and billions of lives. Well, there could have been a different movie delving into that ethical question, but it wasn't Avengers. It just came off as Wanda being a feminine-coded brand of weak and it made me unhappy.
no subject
Date: Jun. 29th, 2018 07:38 pm (UTC)I keep meaning to write down thoughts about Solo, but…man, I was so disappointed. I wasn't exactly psyched for it going in, but even if the movie hadn't been SO dark in presentation (which is an actual thing, unfortunately, that happens with many theatres) I still felt almost nothing. My friend, who's easy to please, liked it much more, and he went again right after and said he enjoyed it so much more when he knew what was happening--that knowing the progression of the story he found more things to enjoy. I kiiinda thought about trying it myself, but meh.
no subject
Date: Jul. 1st, 2018 02:07 pm (UTC)That's right, I forgot about that! Harder than it should have been to see what was going on in the beginning scenes and in interior ship shots later. Whyyyy
>> I kiiinda thought about trying it myself, but meh.
Meh indeed. Maybe when it's out on DVD/streaming.
Unnecessary rambly comment is late to the party.
Date: Jul. 3rd, 2018 07:50 am (UTC)My favourite scene was Han and Chewie's first meeting. I think pretty much everyone in the audience knew who the beast would turn out to be but I still liked how easily these two creatures of the universe turned the tables from the get-go (well, obviously, right?).
I loved L3 but of course pretty much anticipated she was going to end up worse for wear the second she showed up, aaargh. Movie, I am disappoint!
I also didn't care at all about Han and Daenerys, not just because of the way it was told to the audience that these two cared for each other but because I'm all for Han/Leia (although I'm now re-watching the original trilogy and just now paying attention to how Han is really, really, really pushy which makes me kind of iffy toward him...)